During my training years as a psychotherapist, a colleague became pregnant and she attended all of our monthly weekend modules throughout her pregnancy. It felt for all of us that the developing baby was very much a member of our group. Jack was born during the summer break and made his first debut in the new term. He arrived in a baby sling firmly swaddled facing into his mother, unaware he was part of anything else other than his symbiotic ‘non-dual’ relationship with his mum. All his needs met by the attunement of his mother with her baby. The second month followed a similar pattern, but when Jack was awake he would try and turn his head, aware and curious of others in the room. By the third month Jack was still held by mother in his sling but this time he was facing outwards. His gaze full of wonderment at the wider world he was now part of.
I sit in my room in the ‘Comfy Chair’ as I begin my morning practise. Focussing on my breath, aware of my thoughts, using the breath to calm and settle my mind. This is my safe place where I can return to whenever I choose. I could choose to build a cocoon around this place of safety, close my eyes and, shutting out the noise of the world, turn in towards myself. Or, it could provide a secure base from where I can begin to explore and move into less comfortable areas. A parallel perhaps between my experience and baby Jack’s where we both journey into awareness of how we are part of a bigger world - into awareness itself.
I would like to connect my journey to three of Nigel’s recent blogs.
Start with the Comfy Chair: As Jack built upon the safety that his mother created, I know the importance of establishing a safe space through my mindfulness practise. I can come and go as I feel the need, however if I choose to stay cosy in the safety and security of this known place I loose the opportunity to be part of a bigger infinite space of awareness.
Eyes Wide Open: Similarly, when Jack became ready to open his eyes and face outwards, I too can turn my gaze outward, open my eyes and do nothing. We both move beyond the safety of our Comfy Chair.
Something New: And of course I too feel the struggle and challenge of learning something new. I want to return to old familiar patterns of practise. I struggle to stay with not knowing. I want to put understanding and meaning to my experience - which is what I have just done here!
Christine Ackers-Griffin 2 March 2024
Such a helpful , inspiring piece of writing and image, Christine, as of the security of baby held inward , inner sanctuary, before turning to be fully immersed , wide eyed as baby Jack .
Lovely comfy chair too.
Thanks Christine - first of many?