What is it with Comfy Chairs?

Writing a blog is interesting. You can see how many people read it - or at least momentarily open it! Out of all the posts on this site, the one on the Comfy Chair has been the most popular.

Today it struck me that it's something about the feeling an image gives us - a feeling that deep down inside we yearn for. For example: in two weeks time we are going to start a new book by Daniel Goleman and Tsoknye Rinpoche called 'How to Meditate'. In this Tsoknye Rinpoche teaches us how to be with the felt-sense in exactly the same way we have learnt to practice it already, but here he gives it a new name - the hand-shake practice. It just feels cosy doesn't it? Warm, going towards a hug. Hello, glad to meet you, let's hold hands. Of course what he's really talking about is a wise and kind way to be with our emotions without resorting to pushing them away or being overwhelmed by them. Emotions that are difficult to stay with because they are painful or disturbing. Here again he uses a good feeling word, he calls them our 'beautiful monsters' - although while they may be monstrous they seldom feel beautiful - and here again he's just trying to encourage us to be friendly and accepting of the stuff that goes on within us.

I wonder if we have the same thing going on with the comfy chair? What this metaphor points to is a place where we may just come and rest - plonk ourselves down and let out a big sigh of relief. And there is some truth in this. Mindfulness of an object - concentrating on our breath, physical sensations or the senses - can with practice begin to generate a calm state in as much that we begin to cultivate some equanimity. That's why it's called 'calm abiding', shamatha - we abide or rest in being OK with whatever happens. Lovely. It's something that we all yearn for. It's a refuge.

However, (there is always a 'however'), we probably can't let ourselves get too comfortable because we may just doze off. Tsoknye Rinpoche calls this 'stupid meditation' - a kind of warm semi-conscious state that is without clarity. A bit like a semi-doze in a warm bath. What interests me with this (familiar) state is just how desirable it is. It's that yearning again for the safe space where we can just let go and be looked after. It's mother. Looked at like this we have our old favourites, the pig, chicken and snake making an appearance. The desire to go unconscious accompanied by wanting and not wanting. The three root poisons in Buddhist parlance. When this trio gets hold of our practice it's not wrong or bad but it's something to be aware of and a signal that the comfy chair is OK but maybe just now we need to sit forward a bit and wake up.

And this leads me to two other bits of seductive cosiness. First - eyes closed or shut. We have visited the explanation for this many times but what about an experiment - when the desire to close ones eyes creeps up what is the felt-sense of this? Is it that it will really deepen and sharpen our attention or are we wanting to sit back in a pile of soft cushions and let go? When it happens next see what you notice. And a second: guided meditation - my feeling is that a lovely calming voice leading us in meditation may sometimes have more to do with soothing a very young part in ourselves and less about aiding mindfulness. It's like a gentle song as we slip into sleep. We may half wake momentarily but there it is, still warm and present, and off we go again almost immediately. Ahhhhh ....... So what is the felt-sense around this?. What is it like with and without it? Do we have likes and dislikes. wanting and not wanting?

One last thing about our cosy chair practice of simple mindfulness. The Buddha taught that all meditation has two joined elements - calm and insight. That when we sit in our cosy chair, providing we don't fall asleep in its cushions, then we will quite quickly begin to see into our mind - how could we not when sitting there with nothing else to do other than observe it? This is important to remember if we begin to think that the cosy chair is just an easy place to go but is not quite as 'advanced' as the felt-sense room and certainly the 'doing nothing' room. It's definitely not, the Buddha said that he became awakened simply by following his breath, "Breathing in I know I'm breathing in, breathing out I know I'm breathing out".

NW. 18 April 2024